My wife and I just celebrated our first anniversary with a weekend getaway to Petoskey. It was a lovely time in a lovely town, but being the keen reporter I’m trained to be, I realized some observations about Gaylord, and Northern Michigan as a whole.

1. I am clearly in the minority because I am not a die-hard hunter. As we roamed the streets of Petoskey, I felt like I was a contestant on “The Bachelorette.” There were no guys around, and the ladies were loving it.

I even saw a group of women amble out of a minivan decked in camoflauge shirts and orange hunting vests with fake deer antlers crowned on their head. This wouldn’t have been so strange were it not for a blown-up, fake dead hunter tied to the front of the car. I don’t mean to sound stereotypical, but, boy I thought I was in a Jeff Foxworthy comedy skit at that point.

2. It’s interesting to hear what people think of Gaylord in other places. Most comments, especially this time of year, refer to our high snowfall counts. One guy said there’s a local joke that “even if it’s not snowing in Petoskey, it’s probably snowing in Gaylord.”

But I also got the impression of being the younger little brother to towns like Traverse City and Petoskey. One person said that Gaylord is so little, but then expounded that she likes many of our shopping choices. I was going to mention that our high school is bigger than their high school, but who really cares?

And then their was my favorite, coming from one of my favorite local entertainers, Mike Ridley, while we were enjoying dinner. This musician loves to poke fun of just about anything — including Northern Michigan towns. His song about the Alpine Village, to the tune of The Who’s “Behind Blue Eyes:”

Nobody knows what it’s like to live in Gaylord, in a trailer, behind Kmart.

Hey, I may not live in a trailer, but I live pretty darn close to the Big K. He made fun of Petoskey too.

3. This is an ongoing observation, but I feel that Northern Michigan should create its own state, or even country. There seems to be such a clear separation between upper and lower Michigan that it’s amazing to me.

I asked a friend where they were spending Thanksgiving this year and she replied, “In Detroit.” Of course, I asked if she meant literal downtown Detroit, and she replied, “Don’t you know. Anything south of Grayling is downstate and everything south of Flint is Detroit.” How can you argue with logic like that?

It’s not just our perception of them. It’s their perception of us. In college people were always interested in those of us from downstate. “What’s it like to live in the middle of nowhere?” they asked. “Is it true that everybody has hunting camps?”

Which brings me back to my first point. I know that perception doesn’t always equal reality, but if I listened to everyone, I would think that I am a redneck hunter from the sticks, who lives in a trailer, never stops shoveling snow who doesn’t know Ann Arbor from Grand Rapids.

Believe what you want, but I’ll go back living my wonderful life in what appears to be Michigan’s best kept secret.

— Jeremy Speer is the Herald Times sports editor. You can write to him at PO Box 598, Gaylord, MI 49734 or e-mail jeremy@gaylordheraldtimes.com.

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